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or else

Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011

After the transmission went on my car this week, I’m craving some more reliable wheels.  I’m not fussy, but it would be nice to have something that was a bit sleeker and more of a personality match than the old wagon is.  Hmm…  Something drop-dead gorgeous.  Something shiny.  Something that suits my tendency to wink at the dark side.  Something like this Cruisin Casket!

The top conveniently opens up to reveal the cozy satiny interior, just like a standard coffin.

I thought I found my new wheels, until I realized these aren’t coffin cars, but  coffin’s shaped like cars.  Still a genius idea for the auto enthusiast who wants to go out in style, but not something that’s going to solve my earthly dilemma of getting to and fro.  Oh well.  I guess I have to spend the $1500 to get my car going again.  As for the Cruisin’ Casket, the good news is I don’t have to wait until I’m dead to get one.  I can get one now and with a simple replaceable liner, it converts into a super cool giant ice chest.  What better way to chill my blueberry beer than in my very own future coffin?!

Hope you are all having a great month.  My March has been wonky.  The car broke.  The phone broke. Photoshop broke. I was sick twice.  My cat Pooti is ill (but on the mend, I think) and my computer’s getting blue screens.  I’m ready for some awesome good stuff to happen now.

Oh wait… I have had a bit of good news!  I was accepted into Art Rock again this year.  I’ll be road trippin’ it to West Palm Beach  for the May 7th show along with my friends Demi of  DemiGod Studio and Coralette aka the Crafty Hag.  So March hasn’t been all bad.  Actually, I also received an invitation to some sort of Groupon customer party tomorrow night with ribbon performance artists and stilt walkers and yummy food.  A free, carnival themed party is nothing to sneeze at, right?  Okay, so much for my pity party.

Speaking of which, I have to tell you Groupon has been well-worth joining.  Sure, it’s another daily email in an already bulging box, but I’ve got half off dinners at local restaurants and 60 % off a local market and a 60% off a local funky thrift shop. Basically, places I already go to or wanted to try. My mom got buy one get one free stained glass classes for us that we haven’t used yet and a manatee adventure for her, jim and I.  It’s been pretty awesome.  I’m going to put my personal link up so that if you decide to join Groupon I get a credit (because why wouldn’t I)?  But, I’d have told you about it anyway.  I’m surprised I haven’t mentioned it before now as I’ve been taking advantage of their coupons since before Christmas.

JOIN GROUPON or  Learn More

I’m glad I blah’gd tonight.  I think I’ve been focusing on what’s gone wrong lately and until just now hadn’t really thought about what’s gone right.  Thanks.

Oh, btw, this week’s comic is going to be a new addition to the GingerDead Greetings.  I’ll work on formatting it and getting it printed soon.

<3 calan

7 Responses to “or else”

  1. Darlene Says:

    Awe its a pity i cant get the cruisin casket. u arent the only one with car trouble. the power sterring went out of my car something weird happened to the window i think the supernatural is messing with me again cause the window just rolled itself slowly down. it makes a weird noise so i think i messed something up with the motor not for sure. i need my mechanic aka my boyfriend to look at the thing but hopefully i can get a truck soon. but i hope nest month goes better for you and good luck if it doesnt

  2. calan Says:

    thanks. i forgot to mention that this gingerdead site broke too one day. shut down and everything. i had to jump thru some hoops to get it up again. luckily, everything’s been put back together so far…mostly, except a bit more car issues, and today pooti isn’t doing so well. i think it’s the medication. vet ok’d me to pull her off the antibiotics. hopefully, she’ll feel better soon. 🙁

  3. Seraphine Says:

    i’d never use a coffin as an ice cooler. first of all, it’s going to smell like beer. then pretty soon, it’s inevitable it’s going to smell like vomit. before morning arrives, your cute lil car coffin will have mustrard stains, rips, leaked water stains and probably uncle jerry sleeping in it. no. no. nonono.

    smile or the bunny
    stuffing goes into coffins
    mana for mummies

  4. GL Says:

    That’s fancy lookin’ for sure.

  5. Matthew Says:

    I never understood fancy coffins or ultra expensive grave markers. You are freakin dead, what’s the point. When i die i don’t give a rats ass what they do with the body. It’s not really me anymore, so whatever. I would rather use that money on something while i am alive or leave it to family.

    the contagious smile
    a last gift for the living
    remained on his face

  6. calan Says:

    awwww that’s such a sweet haiku matthew!

    …and i couldn’t agree more about the fancy bullshit. it’s a nice racket, pressuring the bereaved into this ‘last chance’ to overspend on their loved one. i couldn’t care less what they do with me…well it would be cool to be part of the Bodies exhibit! other than that…

  7. Ted Says:

    How about this? http://www.limohearse.com/

    Found it a while ago, but I believe they’re in TX – the ’69 with the red interior is just perfect 🙂

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