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Comic

thanks for ruining Halloween

Wednesday, October 14th, 2009

This weekend at the ART-oberfest the vendor across from me had this little canvas bag with a smiling piece of candy corn made of felt or something sewn on the front and all day long it was looking over at me…and I at it.  It was totally adorable and made me grin every time I looked, but it got me thinking about how deceptive candy corn is and (I suspect) controversial.

I myself am not a fan. My boyfriend doesn’t care for it.  The mere sight of it nauseates another friend.  My mom, however, will eat the stuff.  Come to think of it, she is the only person I can think of who likes it.  But, this is a woman who will eat jelly directly out of the jar and pushes the cake aside to attack the icing. Basically if there is sugar involved, she’s all over it.  Okay, so based on the rest of my friends and family, candy corn is not very well-liked.  I assume this is the case in general but if so, who the heck is buying the gazillions of bags being sold every year?  Maybe it’s just one of those things people feel like they have to have for the sake of tradition?  Perhaps people buy it assuming other people like it and are just trying to be nice?

Candy corn is does remind me of my favorite season: Autumn, Halloween, etc.  Those brown and orange ones are so pretty I occasionally convince myself that they must taste as good and might even be chocolatey what with the brown and all… and then I try one and i’m reminded it’s just a hunk of colorful solidified corn syrup…bleh.  Jim says as a kid he would eat the different sections of color one at a time trying to place the flavor and assuming each color tasted different, he’d struggle to distinguish the difference with his tiny taste buds.  Poor kid.  The colors all taste the same but wouldn’t be convinced of that until he had a sick belly filled with undigested candy corn and resentment.

On the positive side, candy corn are cute and fun to stick on your teeth for make-believe fangs or rotten zombie teeth, so yay for that.  Although sticking them in your mouth means you’ll probably end up tasting them so that’s not so great afterall.  They do look pretty in a bowl and will last quite a long time (especially since no one really eats them) before becoming a sludgy mess.   I don’t really know what else is good about them.  Maybe they give us something to hate together?

After writing this much on the subject, I got curious and just bounced around google to learn what the heck candy corn is made of.  Here’s an excerpt from TLC Cooking that adds to the “Ew!” factor for me:

“Manufacturers use the “corn starch molding process” to create the signature design. A machine fills a tray of little kernel-shaped holes with cornstarch, which holds the candy corn in shape. Each hole fills partway with sweet white syrup colored with artificial food coloring. Next comes the orange syrup, and finally, the yellow syrup. Then the mold cools and the mixture sits for about 24 hours until it hardens. A machine empties the trays, and the kernels fall into chutes. Any excess cornstarch shakes loose in a big sifter. Then the candy corn gets a glaze to make it shine, and workers package it for shipment to stores. “

Read the full article ‘ What is Candy Corn and How is it Made ?” on TLC’s How Stuff Works.

New Stuff of Mine…

Here’s just a few of the latest releases in my illustrated jewelry line available here.  Each piece is hand formed, hand illustrated in pen and ink and acrylic paint and double varnished for a bit of shine and extra protection.  No two are ever exactly alike!

Voodoo Zombie Love Doll:

Voodoo Zombie Love Doll

Sneering Bride of Frankenstein Ring:

Sneering Bride of Frankenstein Ring by Calan Ree

Who Cares?  Maybe Owl Does!  Then Again…

Owl Pendant Necklace - Illustrated Jewelry by Calan Ree

everything is better with a mustache! (like this skeleton tie clip / lapel pin)

Skeleton with Mustache - Illustrated Jewelry - Tie Tack / Lapel Pin -

I wanted to plug some awesome fashion designs I’ve recently come across, but it will have to wait until next week.  I’ve already taken up too much of your time with my candy corn ponderings and self-promotion!   Thanks for reading, please feel free to express your love / hate for candy corn in haiku form in the comments section below.

Hai-Who?

Haiku= 3 Lines made up of 17 Syllables – 5,7,5 respectively.  Still not sure? Just browse through the archives to read other haiku comics or reader’s haiku replies and you’ll get the hang of it. 

This site is all about teh funz and not the lah-dee-dahs, so don’t ever be afraid to try.

<3 Calan P.S.  Guess who stopped by my booth and said thanks for the blahg-ing?  Artist Daniel Mrgan – that bad ass wood burning guy I told you about.  Getting to meet him and tell him how much I loved his recent solo show was the highlight of my day.  He was super nice too!  😀

13 Responses to “thanks for ruining Halloween”

  1. Andrew Foose Says:

    What is the big deal
    I’m not sure what you just said.
    I like candy corn

  2. Amanda Says:

    Sweet orange pieces of goo
    Oh Autumn how we love you
    keep the damn candy

    I dislike candy corn so much. And the candy corn pumpkins too. They dont so much taste like glue to me but like sweetened cardboard. And I know what cardboard tastes like (one of those side affects of having siblings). Jim is not alone I used to try to bite it in sections swearing they each tasted different. I get the candy corn pumpkins every year thinking oh I like these. But all it is is candy corn in a pumpkin shape and I eat a few and realize I just wasted money on junk the roaches wont even eat. Which they wont. I’ve left it out on the counter and they will ignore it until it disolves or gets wet someway and then I have a sticky mess to clean up.

  3. Seraphine Says:

    i plant candy corn
    in soft dirt that smelled of worms
    with some powdered bone

    arose from the stink
    a grown gummy skeleton
    with large candy ears

  4. Creeplings Says:

    I like candy corn. It tastes like yummy delicious corn syrup. At least, some kinds do. Other kinds taste like sugar swept up off the floor and mixed with thin glue.
    Depends on how lucky you are.

  5. Jim Says:

    Candy corn yummy?
    The spam of the candy world
    could be used as glue.

    Explosives perhaps?
    Or vomit inducing tool?
    Anything but food…

    Bleh.

  6. Crinaya Says:

    Finally I see.
    Candy corn is like fruitcake.
    Not wanted but there.

    I actually enjoy (select) candy corn. In particular, the Brach’s autumn mix (both the yellow and brown candy corn and the little pumpkins) because it’s sweetened with honey instead only corn syrup. But you can’t eat too many of them.

    And still to this day I swear I can taste a difference in the different colors, but I don’t know if it’s in my head or if I’ve come to know the tastes of different food dyes.

  7. calan Says:

    Crinaya no you’re right. the brown bottom of those autumn ones really is chocolate ‘flavored’ S

    I’ve learned some brands do sweeten with honey while others are just corn starch and corn syrup and bleh. honey, huh? i actually love honey and am drinking earl grey with honey in it right now. maybe i was only fed ghetto candy corn in the past.

    Thank you everyone for the haiku!

  8. Karen Says:

    Sneaky confection
    of tricksy, pretty colours:
    I always forget!

    “It can’t be that bad,”
    I will muse, then a taste of —
    Ew! Ick! Blaugh! Nasty!

    Time to go wash out
    my mouth for another year …
    you win this time, corn!

  9. Seraphine Says:

    bad ass wood burning
    it’s not the knots that get you
    it’s the gnarley cracks

  10. Jerus Says:

    Halloween is here
    have no money no costumes
    i am a sad man

  11. Patrice Says:

    I agree with you.
    Candy corn tastes like glue.
    Avoid at all costs.

    Hope you remember us….my daughter Emily and I met you at the Art Oberfest. Here is my website. Hope you like my Halloween Punkin Head Jewelry!
    Patrice

  12. Seraphine Says:

    sad is a costume
    if you’re worn down at the heels
    say trick or pity

  13. coraline Says:

    i hate candy corn, but you made themm look so adorable!!!!

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