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no thank you

Wednesday, February 21st, 2007

Thanks for all your wonderful haikus last week. Your comments and haiku always make me smile. I can easily see how much traffic the site gets, but having a bit of interaction with the readers is way more rewarding and encourages me to keep it up.

This week’s strip came about as I was recalling how growing up we were told that saying, ‘Bless You’, when someone sneezed was not only polite but like necessary or something, because when you sneezed your heart stops for a moment. It’s complete rubbish, of course. Your heart doesn’t stop and sadly your eyes wont pop out if you manage to sneeze with your eyes open.

I was also pondering how someone in a super good mood can irk people. All that glowing happiness is toxic to someone hell bent on being miserable.

Another thing on my mind was how much I can’t stand being told to smile by complete strangers. It’s happened my whole life and it’s always guys that say it. I don’t know who walks around with a giant smile plastered on their faces, but apparently guys want me to. I think that would be rather creepy to be honest. Funny thing is I can be in a perfectly wonderful mood and some random jackass will tell me to smile and then I want to kill things. So, if you are one of those people that think it’s cute, quit it. It’s annoying.

Have a great week. I’ll see you on Wednesday.

<3 calan

24 Responses to “no thank you”

  1. Gabe Lippmann Says:

    hahahahaha. Wonderful as always 😛

  2. Poe Tatum Says:

    I can relate to this strip a lot… I feel like choking the crap out of nice people all the time! Way to go V!

    On a different note…. I have an absinthe spoon you can have!!

  3. calan Says:

    gimme! now i just need about 100 bucks to order a bottle. screw you 38 euro shipping!


  4. Alan Says:

    Replying to the blog: Wasn’t “Bless you”originally said because a sneeze meant the devil was in the sneezer or nearby?

    Replying to the shipping comment: Yes, we know the shipping charges are quite high, which is why some of us try to keep our absinthe prices as low as we can (buying directly from the distiller helps!). Find an absinthe you like and buy 3/4 bottles a time to keep the average cost down.

  5. calan Says:

    i can’t say for certain but i always heard it was the heart stops myth and i asked some friends in the UK if they said bless you and why and they gave me the same reason. then i did some googling on it and came up with the same. but, i wouldn’t be surprised if both myths were active at some point. maybe the ‘heart stop’ replaced the devil one in modern times?

    i’m checking out your absinthe now. i agree that buying in bulk is the way to go because the shipping is so high, but i’m pretty broke so i’ll be lucky if i manage to get my hands on one bottle. 😛 anyway, it’s nice to have you here mr. absinthe shiller! welcome aboard!

  6. Rodro the Ultimate Says:

    Related to having to say ‘Bless you’ when you sneeze, covering your mouth when you yawn was once thought to stop your soul from escaping via your gaping maw mid-yawn.

    …just thought y’all might want to know….


  7. calan Says:

    so that’s where it went!

    i love urban legends, myths and the like. thanks for sharing Rodro!

  8. amanda Says:

    no matter how hard you try it is impossible to keep your eyes open while sneezing. just an automatic body reflex. try keeping them open sometime.. can’t do it. 😛

    i love the art here… the happy girl is so cute… and V’s wide eyes are perfect in the 3rd panel. also, the actual sneeze looks really cool. it reminds me of a smeared watercolor. 🙂

  9. EvilCouch Says:

    Hahahah! I love it!

  10. NobleSavage Says:

    Yeah, I feel like that some times.

    I’ve always heard the whole deal about the devil being in you when you sneeze and thus you “bless them”. It’s all codswallup really.

    Can’t wait until we can all agree about the Bible’s ludicrousy just as we do about sneezing and yawning these days.

  11. calan Says:

    i cant wait til it starts raining in absinthe. until then i’m just going to keep trying to sneeze with my eyes open. i hate to think i’m missing anything.

  12. Poe Tatum Says:

    Don’t forget to add cold water to your absinthe!! You put a sugar cube on the absinthe spoon and poor cold water over it. Don’t drink it straight from the bottle! Yay for my knowledge! LOL!!

  13. calan Says:

    yep i know. the ritual is what makes it so beautiful and intriguing to me. but, i have never had so much as a sip. 🙁 i’m an idiot because i was in france for a few days a couple of years ago and it didn’t even cross my mind to get some.

    that absinthe scene in Stoker’s Dracula is so sensual. yum.

  14. Wiz Rollins Says:

    Calan, beautiful stuff as always.

    Just wanted to drop a line and say thanks for your “tutelage”… it’s made a HUGE difference. 😉

  15. calan Says:

    thanks! it’s good to see you, wiz.


  16. justme Says:

    You know what I hate? When I’m winding up for a good sneeze and someone pre-emptively says “bless you.” For some reason that always just shuts it down for me and I’m left feeling cheated and unfulfilled. Sneezeus interruptus.

    As for a mere description of absinthe preparation and consumption being sensual – does that mean it’s an aphrodisiac? As in, “absinthe makes the heart grow fonder?”

    All right, sorry ’bout that, I’ve got a nasty cold and am drugged to the gills today. It seemed funny to me…

  17. calan Says:

    hehe it was funny! oh, i do the sneezus interruptus to people by making fake sneezes just as their winding up. it amuses me to annoy people sometimes.

    i hope you feel better soon. 🙂

  18. Adam YG Says:

    bravo… as a heathen, I have to use ‘gesundheit’, though I don’t mind when people say ‘bless you’ to me (though I often answer ‘no need’).

    The thing is, it seems like a similar thing should be said when people yawn… any suggestions?

  19. calan Says:

    How about:

    From the snares of the devil,
    Deliver us, O Lord.


    Nice tonsils, dooood!

  20. justme Says:


    Your uvula is showing.

    I like to say ‘gesundheit’ too. Aside from the heathen thing it’s just more fun to say and it’s the only excuse I ever get to use my high school German. And I think it sounds more Goth, somehow. Or maybe that’s just because I picture it written in old German handwriting.

    I once knew someone who sounded like he was shouting ‘bless you’ himself whenever he sneezed. So no one bothered.

  21. Withershins Says:

    I know a guy who says “God Bless You” and it sounds like he is in fact saying “From the snares of the devil, deliver us O Lord”. Truly obnoxious. Needs a beating from Vendetta.

    Me, I managed to ostracize myself from an entire office of old women by -not- saying bless you… Yes, I am that devil, and these are my snares. Muhuahaha!

  22. calan Says:

    perhaps we should start damning people when they sneeze for contaminating our air. we could start a movement. in time, we could make sneezing socially unacceptable and have it banned everywhere just they did with smoking.

    let’s give it a whirl. next time someone sneezes say, god damn you to hell. see if catches on. 😀

  23. chance Says:

    I missed this comic at some point. Reminds me of the time I imitated someone annoying and said, “Smile, Calan.” Apparently I was more on the money than I knew.

  24. calan Says:

    * shakes wee fist at you *

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